Were those the Boston Bruins I saw on the ice last night? I’m still unconvinced. I have a theory they were all doppelgangers bred in tubes in a lab in Maine. I’m on to you Maine. I know what you do up there.
Back to the Bruins. Last night, fans saw something they’ve been waiting for almost all season. A physical, Bruins dominated game, free of suck-age and crappy third period play. Despite the fact that Matt Cooke deserved to be severely punished, his concussing of our star, Marc Savard, seemed to light the fire that the Bruins so desperately needed.
Tuukka Rask’s doppelganger was on top of his game last night, Mark Stuart (who is absolutely out of his mind) got into two fights, and goals were scored by Blake Wheeler, Old Man Recchi, Patrice Bergeron, David Krejci, and Marco Sturm. Obviously all doppelgangers. Except Recchi. They tried to make his clone, but his DNA was determined to be superhuman. How else do you think he’s still playing like this at his age?
Honestly though, where has this been all season?! Where has Mark Stuart been all season?! This guy needs to beat someone up every game. I mean, fill in for Milan Lucic. Despite most fans’ cries for a more aggressive Looch, I’m buying the excuse that he’s still injured. Sure, injuries heal, but every time he steps onto the ice, he risks tweaking his ankle again. I’m sure he has. So Mark Stuart, come on down! The guy is 2 parts insane and 1 part reckless – a perfect mixture for a fighter. As long as he doesn’t do something idiotic like punch someone in the helmet and break his hand, I’m all for him initiating the physical play on this team. Maybe others will follow suit. After all, the Bruins aren’t a finesse team. They need to play aggressively to throw the opposition off their game. Last night they started to do just that.
Now, I’m not ready to jump back on the Bruins bandwagon quite yet. I’ve been walking behind it at a leisurely pace for most of the season. However, the Bruins play the Habs one last time during the regular season this Saturday night. Their record against the B’s this year is 4-1-0. Yes, they’re one of the best teams in the league, but I’m not convinced they’re unbeatable. We stomped them last year, and despite missing Savvy, the Bruins showed that they can score last night. If they do it again on Saturday, they’re back in my good graces. Mostly.
Until Saturday, I advise you to ride this Bruins high. Take what you can get, alright?
Samantha Lewis is the Creative Director of North Shore Editorial and can be followed on Twitter here. She is an expert in doppelganger creation, and you can read more of her conspiracy theories (or sports writing) over at Beantown Athletic Supporters.
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